Why Praise Can Backfire and How It Can Fuel Perfectionistic Anxiety (and Meltdowns) in Our Children
Praise. What could be wrong with that? We love our kids and want to encourage them. So, why does it sometimes produce the opposite of what we intend? How could a child who is praised actually feel insecure and develop painful perfectionistic anxiety about her own abilities and very worth? We look at the latest research explaining the difference between praising for performance and praising for effort. The pivotal work of Carol Dweck, PhD illuminates how our best intentions can sometimes send the implicit message to our children that they’re outcome and results are more important than their process and effort. We explore the “heart” of perfectionism, and share insights about the nature and purpose of it in our kids, and the role our relationship plays in resolving it.



